Big Time Coffee
by silentreaper06
Summary: The boys learn the hard way not to let Kendall have coffee.


**AN: Hey, guys. I promise I'll update Big Time Ambush later. Right now, this small oneshot was begging to be written.**

**Disclaimer: Do you see BTR Gone Wild yet? Nope? Well, that's because these boys aren't mine.  
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Kendall woke up and walked into the kitchen area, seeing his mother and Katie fully dressed. "Morning, Kendall. Me and Katie are going to the store," Ms. Knight said, noticing her son's awakening. "We'll be gone for a while."

"Okay," Kendall said. He noticed a pot that was half full of coffee, and asked "Can I have some coffee?"

"Do you think you can handle it?" Ms. Knight said, grabbing her purse.

"Mom, I'm sixteen. I think I can handle a cup of coffee."

"Okay, then. Just don't drink too much, I made it really strong." Ms. Knight kissed her son's cheek and said "Love you," before walking out the door.

Kendall poured himself a cup of coffee and took a drink. "Blech!" he said, face puckering up. "Needs milk and sugar." He poured in some milk and dropped in seven heaping spoonfulls of sugar before stirring the brew and taking a sip. Not bad, he decided. He finished his cup and looked to the rest of the coffee. Can't let all of that go to waste.

Hours Later

The rest of the Big Time Rush crew woke up to find an empty tub of coffee, an empty bag of sugar, and a half-empty milk carton, but no Kendall in sight. "Um, guys, where is Kendall?" Logan asked.

"He got up really early this morning," James said.

"And by the looks of this, it looks like he's had enough caffeine to keep an elephant awake," Logan guessed. "Combined with the sugar, this can't be good."

"Oh no! His heart burst!" Carlos said, jumping to conclusions. Then, a flushing sound was heard, and then a fit of giggles, followed by the opening of the bathroom door. The three boys looked over to see Kendall, clad only in his boxers, giggling uncontrollably. The blond looked over and said "Guys! Guys! The toilet makes a funny sound!" Kendall fell on the floor laughing, and Logan stepped forward.

"Kendall, how much coffee have you had?"

"I think about ten cups," Kendall said. "Let's go jogging!" Kendall attempted to run out the door, but Carlos tackled him to the ground.

"Kendall, get some clothes on first," Carlos said.

"But why?" the blond whined.

"Because otherwise-"

"The purple ponies will get me!" Kendall screamed and pushed Carlos off of him, running to his and James's room. James walked in after him and saw the blond fully dressed. "I'm ready, let's go!" James just stood there confused until Kendall got really close and stared into the brunette's eyes. "I see you!" Kendall said in a singsong voice.

"I see you too," James said, matching his friend's singsong voice.

"We should totally get cookies," Kendall said. "Or waffles! Waffles are amazing!" He leapt about a foot in the air before landing on his butt and giggling like an idiot.

"We have to stop this," the other three said simultaneously.

Kendall suddenly turned on the radio, which was blasting "Poker Face" by Lady Gaga. "Oh hell yeah!" the blond screamed, dancing like crazy. "Can't read my, can't read my, no he can't read my poker face! She's got me like nobody!" He continued to sing and walked up to James, grinding his body against the brunette's. "I won't tell you that I love you kiss or hug you 'cuz I'm bluffin' with my muffin, I'm not lyin', I'm just stunnin' with my love-glue-gunnin'!"

"Kendall, you're-" James started.

"Super sexy? I know." Suddenly, Kendall dropped to his knees. "Oh fuck." He fell on his back on the floor, holding his stomach.

"Kendall, you okay?" Logan asked.

"Ugh, I feel like someone just blew a stack of dynamite up in my stomach," Kendall replied.

"Maybe you should lay down on the couch," James said, lifting his friend up and placing him on the couch.

"You might want to get a trash can over here." Carlos grabbed a small trash can and brought it over to Kendall, who vomited in the bucket almost immediately.

"I hope you learned your lesson, Kendall," Logan said.

"Yeah, no more coffee... ever." Kendall puked again, and everybody silently agreed not to give Kendall coffee.


End file.
